An SAT practice essay

For many of us high school students, the SAT is a pretty big thing for us. Considering a lot of colleges use the SAT to judge whether or not they want you or maybe whether you should get a scholarship, getting a good score on the SAT is something a lot of us strive for. Here's a practice essay our teacher set up for us. The question was whether the media (news, newspapers, etc...) decides what information is important to us and whether it shapes our culture and values by their decisions.

In this modern world where new ideas, news, experiences, and many other things can be shared around the world within a matter of hours, minutes, and seconds, you realize how interconnected we all are to each other, even with people across the world. People with different opinions on things or new products that are coming out on market are expressed and exposed to us through the media. Information from the media tells us what’s new, what’s going on, and most importantly what information is important by not showing us the whole story. I believe that the media does decide what information is important and through this shapes cultures and values.
When I was young, maybe about 8, I remember how poke’mon was all in rage. They had poke'mon cards, backpacks, lunch boxes, stuffed animals, games, comics, a TV show, and everything you can expect from mass marketing. Every day when I was younger I would go home and watch poke'mon and play my poke'mon video game. The first time I heard about poke'mon was through commercials for the game and the TV shows. They had so many commercials for it on the kids channels, like cartoon network and Kids WB. My friends were some of the first people I know that got hooked on poke'mon through these commercials and finally got me to join in the poke'mon frenzy. This example shows how the media determines what is important because when kids or teens see an abundance of a certain commercial for a cool new toy or fashion, they tend to what to try the product from themselves.
Another example is how through the news, the media decides which current events are more important. When the Iraqi war started, I remember seeing almost nothing but news on the Iraqi news on all the major news channels. This in turned made me think about the Iraqi war everyday even when I didn’t really want to. I also remember how the news mostly showed how many U.S. soldiers were lost up to that point.

A reflection on this essay:

The first mistake I made about this essay was not finishing it on time (I have to Remember that I only have 25 min!). Also, I should have stuck with one good example proving my point that the media does determine what is important. I have to admit writing essays and such isn't my strong point. I probably could have gone with a stronger introduction too. I am not sure how, but it kind of seems like my introduction is so...average. There is nothing that sticks out and draws in the reader to this wonderful and enlightening topic. Also, when I use an example, I could use more work on providing a good analyzation of that example and how it relates to what I am trying to prove.